ANGER MANAGEMENT

YOU CANNOT AFFORD TO LOSE YOUR TEMPER AND GET ANGRY IN OFFICE THIS IS A COMPLETE NO. BY DOING THIS, YOU CAN LOSE THE UNDERSTANDING OF CO-WORKERS, UPSET GOOD FRIENDS, LOSE THE TRUST OF GOOD CLIENTS AND LOSE THEM AND YOU CAN ALSO LOSE GOOD OPPORTUNITIES.

YOU CANNOT AFFORD TO LOSE YOUR TEMPER AND GET ANGRY OUTSIDE OFFICE, IN YOUR HOMES, MARKET PLACE, SOCIAL CIRCLE OR OTHER PUBLIC PLACES. THIS ALSO IS A COMPLETE NO. HERE TOO YOU TEND TO LOSE GOOD FRIENDS, UPSET FAMILY MEMBERS AND LOSE THEIR SUPPORT AND PEACE AND QUIET OF THE HOUSE IS LOST SO WE CAN CLEARLY SEE THAT ANGER IS SOMETHING TO BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS WHERE EVER YOU MAY BE OR WITH WHOMSOEVER YOU MAY BE.

DEFINING ANGER – ANGER IS AN EMOTIONAL STATE, WHICH VARIES IN INTENSITY FROM IRRITATION – TO AGGRESSION – TO FURY – TO RAGE

THIS DEFINITION TELLS US ABOUT THE 4 STAGES OF ANGER NAMELY

IRRITATION – AGRESSION – FURY AND FINALLY RAGE

WE SHOULD ALSWAYS TRY AND STOP ANGER AT THE IRRITATION OR AGRESSION STAGE AND NOT LET IT SLIP TO FURY AND RAGE

WHEN WE GET ANGRY

BP GOES HIGH

BREATHING BECOMES DIFFICULT

HEADACHE/MIGRAIN, MUSCLE CRAMPS MAY START

ANXIETY INCREASES

CHANCES OF HEART ATTACK

CHANCES OF STROKE

RELEASING ANGER SAFELY

LEAVING THE ROOM OR THE PLACE YOU ARE IN

COUNT SLOWLY TO 50 BREETHING IN AND OUT DEEPLY

HITTING A PILLOW OR PUNCHING BAG

WRITE YOUR FEELINGS AND ANGER DOWN AND THEN TEAR THE PAGE INTO SMALL SMALL PIECES AND THROW IN WASTE BASKET

GO FOR A WALK

SIT ALONE AND LISTEN TO MUSIC

THROW STONES IN A POND AND SEE THE RIPPLES

GO TO A SAFE PLACE ALONE AND SHOUT LOUDLY

THINK OF THINGS OR PLACES THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY

PRETEND YOU ARE TALKING TO THE PERSON WHO MADE YOU ANGRY

IF AND WHEN YOU REALIZE YOUR MISTAKE, GO AND APPOLOGISE SINCERELY FROM THE HEART

TODAYS WORLD IS FULL OF ANGRY MEN AND WOMEN WHO FLARE UP AT THE SLIGHTEST COMMENT

IT HAS BECOME VERY IMPORTANT THAT WE TEACH OUR CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN ABOUT ANGER

SO THAT THEY GROW UP TO BE TOLERANT HUMAN BEINGS

WE SHOULD TELL THEM THAT ANGER IS AN EMOTION WHICH IS NOT BAD, BUT HOW WE EXPRESS IT IS WHAT MATTERS. YOU SHOULD NOT SHOUT OUT, CRY OR BEAT OR THROW YOUR TOYS AND OTHER THINGS ABOUT. COMMUNICATE AND TELL THE OTHERS THE REASON FOR THE ANGER. WE SHOULD NEVER LAUGH AT OUR CHILDREN’S FEARS OR RIDICULE OR MAKE FUN OF THEM. WE NEED TO SET AN EXAMPLE IN FRONT OF THEM WHICH THEY WILL FOLLOW.

DON’T SHOUT AT YOUR SPOUSE IN FRONT OF THE CHILD. IF YOU ARE ANGRY JUST WALK AWAY TO YOUR ROOM AND TALK TO YOUR SPOUSE LATER.

WHETHER YOUR PROFESSIONAL LIFE OR YOUR PERSONAL, ANGER IF NOT PROPERLY CONTROLLED AT THE RIGHT TIME CAN LEAD TO MAJOR ISSUES, THAT YOU MAY REGRET FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

IT IS SAID THAT A FOOL GIVES FULL VENT TO HIS ANGER ALWAYS BUT IT IS A WISE MAN WHO ALWAYS KEEPS HIS TEMPER UNDER CONTROLL

STAY CALM STAY PEACEFUL STAY HAPPY

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NEGOTIATION SKILLS

WHAT IS NEGOTIATION ?

DISCUSSION WITH ONE OR MORE PARTIES WHO HAVE DIFFERENT VIEWPOINTS ON A COMMON SUBJECT TO REACH A CONCLUSION WHICH IS FAVOURABLE TO ALL INVOLVED IN THE DISCUSSION.

NEGOTIATION IS ONE OF THE BEST AND MOST EFFECTIVE WAYS TO AVOID CONFLICTS AND TENSION

WHEN 2 OR MORE INDIVIDUALS DO NOT AGREE WITH EACH OTHER , THEY SIT DOWN AND TALK TO DISCUSS THE ISSUE AND COME OUT WITH AN ALTERNATE SOLUTION WHICH IS AGREABLE TO BOTH OR ALL. THIS IS NEGOTIATION

NEGOTIATION IS ESSENTIAL BOTH IN OFFICE AND IN OUR PERSONAL LIVES TOO.

TYPES OF NEGOTIATIONS – THERE ARE 3 KINDS OF NEGOTIATIONS – TO EXPLAIN LET’S TAKE THIS EXAMPLE – YOU HAVE BEEN SELECTED FOR ANOTHER JOB AND HAVE BEEN CALLED FOR THE HR ROUND WHEN AND WHERE YOUR SALARY IS DISCUSSED AND FIXED. CURRENTLY YOU ARE GETTING AS SALARY A+0. THE NEW COMPANY IS VERY GOOD WITH REAL GOOD SCOPE FOR FURTHER GROWTH. MOREOVER, THEIR OFFICE IS SO CLOSE TO YOUR HOUSE THAT YOU CAN REALLY WALK DOWN TO WORK AND EVEN GO HOME FOR LUNCH.

1.WIN – WIN

THEY OFFER YOU A+1 SALARY AND YOU ACCEPT. YOU ARE HAPPY THEY ARE HAPPY. BOTH HAVE WON – WIN WIN.

2.WINLOSE YOU ASK FOR A+3 AND THEY FINALLY AGREE . YOU HAVE WON AND YOU ARE HAPPY. THOUGH THEY ARE PAYING YOU MORE (AND HAVE LOST) THEY HAVE DONE SO BECAUSE THEY HAVE GOT A GOOD WORKER WHO WILL SURELY BRING IN MORE BUSINESS TO THE COMPANY

OR

YOU ACCEPT A +0 BECAUSE THIS OFFICE IS SO CLOSE TO YOUR HOUSE YOU SAVE ON CONVEYANCE. PROSPECTS OF GROWTH IS MORE HERE.YOU HAVE LOST BUT YOU ARE HAPPY BECAUSE YOU CAN SAVE MORE AND GROWTH PROSPECTS ARE HIGHER. THEY ARE HAPPY TOO GETTING A GOOD WORKER.

3.LOSELOSE YOU REFUSE AND THEY DO NOT INCREASE THE SALARY SO BOTH OF YOU LOSE

6 IMPORTANT POINTS TO BE REMEMBERED DURING A NEGOTIATION

1. BE FULLY PREPARED WITH ALL FACTS, FIGURES, REQUIRED FILES ETC.

2. GO WITH A CLEAR OPEN MIND AND HAVE NO PRECONCIEVED NOTIONS

3. NEVER TAKE A GRUDGE

4. BE POLITE AND NEVER GET ANGRY OR SHOUT

5. SEE THE OTHERS VIEWPOINT ALSO – A BIT OF GIVE AND A BIT OF TAKE

6. PART AMICABLY ON A GOOD NOTE KEEPING DOORS FOR FURTHER NEGOTIATIONS OPEN

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STORY: THE ANGRY CIRCLE

Once a businessman, was getting ready to go to his office. When he reached his car and bent to open the door, a stray dog sleeping under his car suddenly came out and jumped to bite his leg. The businessman quickly pulled his leg back and got terribly angry. He picked up a stone and threw it at the dog. The stone missed the dog and it ran away.

Upon reaching his office, the businessman calls a meeting of his managers and during the meeting he takes out the anger he had on that dog, on them. He shouted at all his managers for poor performance.

The managers also got upset by the scolding’s of their boss and they came out of the meeting irritated and angry. All of them took out their irritation on the department heads working under them. They shouted at all for not bringing in good business and not monitoring the work of their staff correctly and closely.

This chain reaction goes on. The staff working under each department head were called and they got a good scolding for not working hard enough.

The anger this way goes down to the lower level of employees and finally, the anger reaches  the office peon. Now there is no one working under the peon.

The office peon also gets angry  when some staff shout at him. He becomes off mood and grumbles to himself the full day. After office is over, he goes home, and his wife opens the door. She asked him, “Why are you so late today?” The peon being still upset due to anger thrown at him by some staff, gives one slap to his wife! And shouts  “I didn’t go to the office to play football; I went to work so don’t irritate me with your stupid questions!”

Now the wife got upset because  she got a scolding plus a slap for no reason. She puts her anger on the child , a son who was watching tv She gives him a tight slap  and shouts  “This is all you do the full day long tv,…tv….tv, you have no interest in studying! Turn off the TV now and get out of my way !”

The son upset now, angrily walks out of his house and sees a dog passing by looking at him. In his anger and frustration, he picks up a stone and throws it, hitting the dog. The dog barks loudly and runs away yowling in pain.

This was the same dog that had tried to bite the businessman in the morning.

You always reap as you sow. This is how life works. While we all worry about hell and heaven based on our deeds, we should concentrate more on how we are living and behaving. Do good, and good will come to you, do bad and bad will come to you.

 

Life is a mirror. What do you see in it if you stand in front ?

You see yourself. So, if you are kind and good you see kindness and goodness. If you are cruel and bad you see evil and bad.

Please All Of You Think About This
AND DO NOT GET ANGRY. LEARN TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER.

POSITIVE THINKING

Having a Positive attitude helps you face more easily,  the daily ups and downs of life. A Positive attitude  brings optimism into your life. It makes it easier to avoid worries and tensions, which  will always pulls you down
If you adopt Positive Thinking  as your  way of life, it would bring constructive changes into your life. It will make your life happier, brighter and more successful.
With a positive attitude you will always see the brighter side of life, and this makes you an optimist and you expect the best to happen. It is certainly a state of mind that is well worth developing.
Some Simple Ways 
Of Adopting Positive Thinking 
 
Start your day with a smile
Choose to be happy through the day
Find reasons to smile more often
Always look at the bright side of life
Have full faith in yourself
Associate with optimist avoiding pessimist
Reading inspiring stories / quotes
Visualize what you want not what you don’t want
Cultivate gratitude
Be Resilient
Compliment and make another happy
Make someone Happy every day
Develop Friendship
Practice Kindness Daily
Focus on Good Forget The Bad
Be Humble
Never carry grudges
Laughter the best medicine

Success and Failure are the two sides of the same coin

Success comes from good decision
Good Decision comes from experiences
Experiences you gain from your failures
Do Not fear failing. The only thing to do when you fail is to learn from your mistakes and not to repeat them again in future.
Never be disheartened or blame yourself for failures. you should take up the challenge and try again , this time with better approach and stronger efforts
 ” If At First You Don’t Succeed, TRY, TRY, TRY again “
Do you know, Thomas Alva Edison failed 1000 times and then he succeeded in finding out a suitable and successful solution for a light bulb.
There is no need to fear failure. You have to be strong and move ahead and try again, learning from your mistakes to put in better efforts in a better way using better tactics and approach and you will surely complete your tasks successfully.

 

OFFICE ETIQUETTE PART 2

Having your cell phone at work can be useful but it could also be very disruptive.
When it comes to using your cell phone in the office work place you have to be mindful of your co workers – they may be in various stages of concentrated work and your loud talking jars them. kindly chose a private spot for your personal talks to keep it private as it should be. Do remember that walking up and down in the corridor outside and talking loudly on your cell phone is equally irritating. kindly step out or step in the conference room if vacant or rush to the cafeteria or terrace or any other vacant space. The sounds of different ring tones going off at all times can be very annoying to others. You need to therefore keep your cell on silent or vibration mode during the time you are in the office work area. Two place where you should not take in your cell phone are :

the conference room as it is a disturbance to the speakers and the other participants. It is also most insulting for the speaker to see someone rush out with his/her cell stuck to the ears in the middle of his talk. Seriousness is lost , continuity is lost and above all it is just not fair on the speaker who has taken the trouble and the time to prepare his lecture for you.
the wash room as it is an invasion of your co-worker’s privacy
you never know who is in there and you go in talking on your cell phone.
Above all the person on the other end can hear the toilet sounds like the toilet flushing, the running taps… etc etc which is truly revolting.

Wastefulness of paper, current and power, needs to be avoided at all times.
We all have to be a little more environment conscious. We all know that we have to save our trees. Many trees are cut to make paper hence we should sincerely
rethink-reduce-reuse-recycle as far as possible. Take print outs only and only when required. Similarly, we need to conserve electricity and power by switching off computer during lunch time or when away from desk for a long time. You must get into the habit of switching off the light and fans and ac while leaving for the day. Moreover, if you see any light/fan/ac on in an empty room, just switch it off.

Consumption of pan, ghutka, tobacco, snuff and cigarettes inside the office and in your work area has to be avoided at all times. Other bad mannerism like continuously shaking your leg, loudly clearing the throat, yawning loudly with a sing song sound. swinging on your squeaky chair, loud phone talks etc….. should be avoided.

We all need to be conscious about our personal hygiene in office.
Carry mouth fresheners / cloves / cardamom etc for use especially after a smoke outside the office. Bad body odor can be checked with talcum powder, roll ons and deodorants.

Washrooms need to be left neat and clean after use. Please flush properly after use and do check that the tap is closed tight and not dripping. Use the waste basket avoiding littering.

OFFICE ETIQUETTE PART 1

Etiquette is the rules of polite or correct behavior in a society or among members of a profession.

More simply, it means knowing how to behave in different situations and different places
Office etiquette is very important if you want to show your upbringing and set a good example for others to see and follow

A recent office etiquette survey showed that the number one breach of office etiquette was cursing in the workplace, using foul street language. We must realize that this makes other co-workers, especially ladies, very uncomfortable. It may have become a force of habit for you but then you need to change and get conscious about this so that you watch your language in the office work area.

The survey also brought to light that the next 5 most common etiquette breaches were :

Use of cell phones in the work area
Wastefulness of paper, current and power
Bad habits like pan, ghutka, chewing gum, snuff, tobacco and cigarettes
Poor personal hygiene
Washroom etiquettes

. . . . . . . . . . . . TO BE CONTINUED. . . . .

KEEP DEPRESSION AWAY

Depression is very common in our society today and being in a bad mood often is very annoying. Feel depressed ? Here are 10 simple ways of keeping depression away and staying in a good mood :

Get enough sleep – The chances of you being in a bad mood are going to increase if you do not get enough sleep because when you are in bed your brain is developing and resting and your body is repairing itself, so when you sleep for only a few hours you are going to be starting the day on the wrong foot and things can only get worse. Do try your best to get eight hours and you will find that the day becomes that bit easier than it otherwise could have been.
Exercise – Exercise can help your body to produce endorphins and this is a chemical that makes you feel happier as well as fitter. You are not required to go to the gym on a daily basis, but do try to at least do some walking even for just 15 minutes as this can be enough to help put you into a good mood.
Stay hydrated – This may sound like common sense, but you do need to make sure that you drink enough water during the day because being dehydrated will lead to you feeling grumpy and more lethargic than you would normally be. It is important to point out that you are best to drink normal water and not soda or anything else as they contain additives and chemicals that do nothing for you when it comes to improving your mood.
Keep a diary – It has been shown in different studies that keeping a diary and writing down your emotions is a fantastic way of stopping depression getting a hold of you. The idea behind this is that it is for your eyes only, so nobody is going to judge you on what you write and it can be a great way of getting things off your chest rather than letting it eat away at you.
Do not hide away – Even though this may be quite difficult, you do need to try to socialize with people on a daily basis even if this is for a short period of time. Try and avoid becoming a hermit as it then becomes harder to change your mood when you have nobody to talk to, so get out, talk to people, and you will feel better for it.
Eat fruit and vegetables – Fruit and vegetables are crammed full of nutrients and minerals that can help you when it comes to trying to beat depression. By eating them, we are giving our brain the nourishment it needs to function as best as it possibly can, but eat the wrong things such as too much sugar, then your mood will fluctuate as those sugar levels rise and fall.

Meditate – Meditation has been studied by a number of people and there is no doubt that it does help to settle your mind and improve your mood if you have been able to even just get 30 minutes of peace and quiet where you can be alone with your thoughts. If you do not feel like meditation, then prayer does work for people that are religious as the idea is just to get some comfort from it in order to lower those stress levels
Get Vitamin D – Vitamin D, along with Omega-3, is known for helping the brain, but we are often quite guilty of never getting enough of it and this does then have a negative effect on how we feel. Do, therefore, consider using supplements to boost the levels and you should feel a difference, but only if you do this on a daily basis, so make it part of your ritual as you will benefit from doing so.
Be thankful for what you have instead of worry about what is missing – Quite often we can become depressed by thinking about things that are missing from our life, but in actual fact you should remind yourself of what you have several times a day and be thankful for every single thing. The idea with this is to try to get it into your mind that not everything is bad and that small good things do happen to you and all it takes is you to remind yourself in order to put a smile on your face.
Love Finally, make sure that you love those people that you are closest to because we are guilty of thinking we are all alone when depressed and in actual fact this is very rarely the case. Talk to your loved ones each day even if this is just for five minutes at a time and love them with all of your heart because those emotions will help you to see that you are luckier than you thought.

EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

Effective communication is that communication that produces the desired result.
An effective communication is always a two way process.

FACTORS INFLUENCING EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

SENDING THE RIGHT MESSAGE TO THE RIGHT CONCERNED PERSON
TO KNOW THE PSYCHOLOGY OF THE PERSON RECEIVING
TO KNOW THE CIRCUMSTANCES AT THE RECEIVING END

ADVANTAGES OF EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

HELPS TO UNDERSTAND A PERSON OR A SITUATION IN A BETTER WAY

ENABLES US TO SOLVE DIFFERENCES

HELPS TO BUILD TRUST AND RESPECT

GIVES CLARITY AND CLEARS MISSUNDERSTANDINGS AT BOTH ENDS

HELPS US TO CONNECT BETTER WITH ALL
THE 7 C’S OF EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

COMPLETENESS
CONCISENESS
CONSIDERATION
CLARITY
CONCRETENESS
COURTESY
CORRECTNESS
COMPLETENESS – A COMPLETE INFORMATION ALWAYS GIVES ADDITIONAL FACTS WHERE EVER REQUIRED AND LEAVES NO QUESTION IN THE MINDS OF THE RECEIVER
CONCISENESS – MEANS COMMUNICATING WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY IN THE LEAST POSSIBLE WORDS
CONSIDERATION – EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION MUST CONSIDER THE VIEWPOINTS, BACKGROUND, MINDSET, EDUCAYIONAL LEVEL OF THE RECEIVER……… “ STEP INTO THE OTHERS SHOES ”
CLARITY – KEEPING THE SPECIFIC OBJECT TO BE COMMUNICATED, IN MIND RATHER THAN GOING OFF TRACK – USING EXACT AND APPROPRIATE WORDS WHERE REQUIRED
CONCRETE – INFORMATION THAT CANNOT BE MISINTERPRETED OR MISUNDERSTOOD AS THEY ARE CLEAR AND SPECIFIC
6. COURTSEY – BEING POLITE, KIND, RESPECTING, APPRECIATING, THANKING – COURTSEY REFLECTS THE NATURE AND CHARECTER OF THE SENDER AND HENCE IS ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL IN BUILDING CLIENTS
CORRECTNESS – IMPLIES THAT THE CORRECT INFORMATION IS CONVEYED – NO SPELLING MISTAKES – NO GRAMMATICAL ERRORS – USING APPROPRIATE LANGUAGE FOR THE OCASSION – FACTS AND FIGURES ARE RIGHT

SOFT SKILLS AN EMPLOYER IS LOOKING FOR

Being a Graduate alone may not ensure that you get a suitable job in a reputed firm. Employers look beyond graduation to ensure that the candidate selected by them have the right skills and competence suitable for their organization. Every sector/profession /organization has its own very specific skills, abilities and basic knowledge required for a candidate to work successfully. These soft skills are often overlooked by a new job seeker.

Business Acumen

When going for an Interview, a candidate has got a lot of reading and understanding to be done to find out about the company, the nature of its work, the products, its competitors etc etc . During the interview you can then show that you have a basic understanding about the organization, its products and services and this will increase your chances of being shortlisted / selected.

Communication

Employers generally prefer to select candidates with good communication skills. You have to be able to speak well, write well and most importantly listen well. Over enthusiasm often leads to interruptions and not being a good listener. It is important to listen to what the interviewer is asking and reply in a clear, concise and focused way.

Persuasion and Negotiation

A candidate who is able to put up his points rationally, taking into consideration the interviewers viewpoint, to reach a common consensus, displays his negotiation and persuasion skills. Such a candidate stands a better chance of being shortlisted and selected.

Teamwork

It is important to be a good team player having the ability to delegate and take on responsibilities. Its up to you to show the Interviewer that you can work well in a group, building a positive working relationship with all.

Problem Solving

A candidate needs to assure the Interviewer that he has problem solving skills.
An employer prefers a candidate who can solve problems and resolve issues within the team amicably without letting the work suffer. Working life may present many challenges. You need to show the employer that you are a kind of person who will face challenges and find a way through.

Leadership

Graduates need to show potentials to motivate the team and other colleagues working with them. work assignment, division of tasks, setting deadlines, leading by good example etc. etc. They may not be considered for a managerial position right away but such candidates generally get promoted quicker to the managerial level.

Organisation

It is important to show the employer that you can prioritize your work efficiently, managing your time well. Let them know that you focus on what is important and get that done first. Let them know that you strongly believe in meeting set deadlines

Ability to work under pressure

Any work would have its share of tensions, deadlines, crisis etc. You have to show the employer that you are a calm person and even under pressure and in a crisis you can work efficiently and also motivate others to do so instead of loudly cribbing and shouting and creating a negative atmosphere which ultimately effects the work.

Confidence

It is of utmost importance to show confidence in the workplace. You need to strike a proper balance as over confidence could be seen as arrogance, which will go against you. A good employee must have confidence in himself, his organization, his employer and colleagues.